Something up with Which I Will Not Put

So here we are, my laptop and me, snug and warm in my office, just the two of us…
no, wait, who’s this? Why, it’s an external monitor!
Three weeks into the waiting game, I gave in and retrieved my computer. The wretched video cable (NOT the new one) is sitting in my backpack, doing its impression of electronic intestinal disease. The part number is still a mystery, but at least now I have the part in hand – my plan is to march into Future Shop and wave the video cable in people’s faces until someone over there finally figures out which is his ass, and which is his elbow.
In the meantime, the IT people at school have very kindly provided me with a reasonably good monitor, so at least I have an actual computer, right here in my office. My skulking days are over.

1 – buy a refurbished emachines laptop through an e-bay store.
2 – use said laptop happily for about 7 months.
3 – bring laptop to recommended repair shop because display is increasingly not actually displaying anything.
4 – receive call from friendly technician at said repair shop, who has very quickly diagnosed the problem (the video cable looks like it’s been chewed by deranged rats) and says it should take a couple of days to get the part, and a couple of minutes to fix the machine.
5 – get another call from same technician, albeit in a less friendly mood, who has discovered that the only place from which anyone can get the part is Future Shop. Oh, and Future Shop won’t order the part based on a phone call, because they need a physical person to sign the contract, even though there’s no actual repair contract, just a part order, which requires a signature….
6 – armed with part number read directly from video cable, go in person to Future Shop to sign said contract.
7 – try desperately not to kill the nice man at Future Shop when he informs you that there is no such part number, and implies rather overtly that since you thought it was a part number, you are obviously an idiot whose experience with computers is about as in-depth as is his with women.
8 – convince the Future Shop guy to let you at least open a file and sign a &*%#$ contract so you don’t have to come back in person once the whole part number thing has been sorted out.
9 – convince the technician from (4) to speak directly with the Future Shop guy from (7).
10 – two weeks later, find yourself still computerless, waiting for a part number that apparently does not, technically, exist, because although Future Shop is the sole distributor of emachines parts, Future Shop does not deal directly with emachines per se, and besides, emachines products purchased through Future Shop have different part numbers, and so far no one has been able to correctly interpret the camel entrails or something.
Argh.

My pirate name is:

Even though there’s no legal rank on a pirate ship, everyone recognizes you’re the one in charge. Even though you’re not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!
Get your own pirate name from fidius.org.
Are your timbers shivering?
Via Steve

I am still computerless – which, aside from the obvious annoyance in terms of maintaining a regular contact with my fan base, is seriously hindering me. I have mid-term progress reports to make! Exercises to create! Background information to compile! Pointless messages to send! None of which is getting done, thanks to the Mystery of the Missing Part Number.
I’d bore you with the details, but frankly, I’d really bore you with the details. Suffice it to say it’s a good thing that (a) firearms are not readily available and (b) I’m a lousy shot anyway.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have to spend the rest of my precious time in the public computer lab getting rid of the 1000+ spam comments that have recently accumulated. 😛

So, the laptop is in the shop. The video cable is fried. Future Shop (or, as I hope Quebecers call it, Futu Shop) is the only distributor of parts for emachines in the area.
We’re playing a waiting game now.
In the meantime, I’m furtively sneaking into colleagues’ offices and stealing time on their machines, collecting email and updating my student pages as quickly as possible.
So, apologies for the long, dramatic pauses.
I shall return!

So, Canadian anti-Britney Avril Lavigne has chosen this month’s Maxim as the launch vehicle for her new role as a sex kitten. Along with several flirty pix of Miss Manners in various stages of undress, there’s an interview which features the following:
Lavigne begins by saying that she has been unfairly depicted by journalists as having a short fuse.
“The media have portrayed me as an angry girl who’s pissed off all the time,” she says.
In answer to a question about when the last time was she “had to smack a bitch down,” Lavigne responds this way:
“In a bar a few months ago. Some chick came up to me and got in my face and said something, so I kicked her in the box and shoved her. I don’t go looking for fights, but if someone comes up to me and pushes me, I’m not going to take it.”
Ok, as long as she doesn’t have a short fuse or anything.

An impassioned commander with more respect for individuals than for authority, you have a no-holds-barred approach to life and its obstacles.
“I don’t believe in the no-win scenario.”
Via Isabella.

The NHL – that’s the National Hockey League – is involved in some bruhaha over the usual bags of money, and the players are currently locked out. As a result, the hockey season will definitely not start as scheduled, and may not happen at all.
One fan in Toronto had this to say:
“It’s like there’s a cloud over Toronto. It’s just one disaster after another.”

I started writing this post yesterday afternoon.
My fantabulous laptop is pooping out on me. Since it’s a refurbished machine, it’s no longer under warranty. E-machines tech support were able to tell me immediately that the problem is the CPU fan – I suspect this is not an unprecedented case.
The symptoms: the computer gets very hot very quickly, then shuts itself off as a safety precaution. Which would be acceptable were there any warning involved, such as “the system has detected a problem and needs to shut down. Please close all applications.”
This message, however, does not appear. The machine simply stops altogether. On a good day, presumably when there’s good air circulation and low humidity or something, I can work for a couple of hours before this becomes a problem. Unfortunately, the AC here at work is automatically shut off at the beginning of September, so even with my office window open all the time, the air gets warm in here.
I’ve spoken to a recommended techie out in Sherbrooke, who has since reported that he thinks he can get the required part(s), and that he thinks he can take a look at the machine and give me an estimate next week.
Sigh.
Suffice it to say that posting will be sporadic, given that I have to make hay while the sun shines (in other words, make essay questions and grammar quizzes while the computer is up).