But I just got the yellow right!

you are blueviolet
#8A2BE2

Your dominant hues are blue and magenta. You’re the one who goes to all the parties but doesn’t quite fit in at every one… you know what you want, but are afraid of what the world might think of it. You’re a little different and that’s okay with them, and if you’re smart it’s okay with you too.

Your saturation level is higher than average – You know what you want, but sometimes know not to tell everyone. You value accomplishments and know you can get the job done, so don’t be afraid to run out and make things happen.

Your outlook on life is bright. You see good things in situations where others may not be able to, and it frustrates you to see them get down on everything.

the spacefem.com html color quiz

via SheilaRene

Spam, spam, spam, spam…

In the last two days, I have received five email offers to order Tylenol 3 with codeine online. One of these messages says, “why suffer the embarrassment of asking your local doctor?”
Am I missing something? Why would I be embarrassed to ask my personal doctor for Tylenol? The only reason I can come up with is excessive use – which leads me to ask:
Are these people crazy??
For all intents and purposes, they are blatantly promoting unsafe drug use. Now, it’s one thing for Americans to do their crossborder drug shopping on-line – that’s a case of availability, cost and health insurance. But to actively solicit, with the not-so-subtle implication that this is a recreational drug, is beyond the pale.
Frankly, the whole thing – the message, coupled with the inundation – is giving me a headache…
Now that’s a marketing strategy.

Explanatory Note

As promised, or threatened, depending on your point of view, I have started putting together some of my writing from days gone by. “The Moving Blues,” which first appeared in the Vanier Phoenix more than a dozen years ago, is the first of these.
I plan to post some of my fiction as well, assuming I don’t make myself gag in the process of retyping it.

The Moving Blues

or,
How to Disorganize Your Life in Four Easy Steps
Imagine, if you will, a young couple. They have been seeing each other for about two years, and have decided to take the BIG STEP: living together. Shudders of morality aside, let’s take a look at the worst part of the relationship to date – the one thing that can destroy your happiness, not to mention your back. The Move.

Continue reading “The Moving Blues”

The (Gulp) War

Originally published in the Vanier Phoenix, 1991.
It seems to me that the President of the United States of America, a.k.a. the “leader of the Western world,” should be able to afford at least one advisor well-versed in Middle Eastern affairs and diplomacy.

Continue reading “The (Gulp) War”

Sex sells

It recently occurred to me that what’s missing from the current Democratic primary race is sex.
Let’s look at this historically: in the last 50 years, the most successful US presidents (Dem.) are Kennedy and Clinton, both of whom were plagued by sex scandals, and the more we learn about them, the steamier they get.
Carter kept the “lust in his heart” and the beast in his pants – and lost his reelection bid to some actor from California.
LBJ, meanwhile, branded all the females in his entourage with his initials, but although he followed through on several Kennedy initiatives, such as civil rights and the space program, he failed to keep up, well, “it.”
Kennedy and Clinton, on the other hand, were randy buggers who, it seems, were willing to boff anything in a skirt (or a blue dress). I’m willing to admit my ignorance when it comes to American presidents pre-1960, but I bet there are even more examples of the Democratic Ass gettin’ some.
So, Democratic candidates, listen up – get out there and get dirty. Your country needs you (note the very, very subtle wordplay. Shakespeare did it first).

It was only a matter of time

Leave it to our litigious neighbours to the south. A class-action suit has been filed “on behalf of all Americans” against Janet “this boob’s for you” Jackson:
Terri Carlin, a 47-year-old Knoxville bank employee, contends that Jackson’s exposure and other “sexually explicit conduct” during halftime festivities caused viewers to “suffer outrage, anger, embarrassment and serious injury.”
Also named in the suit: Justin Timberlake, CBS, MTV and Viacom. Apparently the Patriots and the Panthers are not being held accountable for the outrage, anger, and embarrassment, although the serious injury charge might stick.
Via Tenorman
I will grant you that this is a case of nonnewsworthiness, and that just thinking about that massive piercing makes certain bits of my anatomy cringe, but I still say I’d rather be exposed (pardon the pun) to Janet’s boob than Michael’s face.
Shudder.

Unelected Officialdom

Canada has bid a farewell, fond or otherwise, to Jean Chretien, after more than a decade at the helm. His successor, Paul Martin, is currently experiencing the pendulum swing of media favour. During the federal election campaign in 2000, rumours were rife that Chretien was planning to retire practically as soon as he was sworn in – and that Martin was the presumed heir to the Liberal throne. In other words, a vote for Chretien was a vote for Martin – and the votes were cast.
Now, however, there seems to be a growing sentiment of “well, we didn’t vote for you, buddy.” Particularly in light of the most recent little oopsie: in February 2003, the government reported that it had paid about $137,000 to a shipping company owned by Paul Martin. The numbers, as it turns out, were a little off.
By a factor of 1,175.
New figures released this month show that in fact, the government gave the shipping company contracts worth $161 million.
Martin’s response? He said he knew immediately upon hearing it that the $137,000 figure was wrong.
“I was appalled when I saw what the original answer had been,” he said.
So, about a year ago, he saw the number, knew it had to be wrong, and didn’t say a word???
Well, I didn’t vote for you, buddy.
Meanwhile, away down south, Senator John McCain is putting the blame for Iraq on – wait for it – Bill Clinton. According to McCain, it was Clinton who was snowed by faulty intelligence, and since Clinton signed the Iraqi Regime Change Act in 1998, the Bush league cannot be held accountable.
That’s right – the Democrats did it.

The Parrot, Part II

According to Winston Churchill’s daughter, Charlie the Parrot is a fraud.
Lady Soames says that the Churchill family did have a parrot, but a different one, for a few years, but the idea that Churchill taught the bird to swear at Nazis is, and I quote, “too tiresome for words”.

Once more with feeling

Okay, here we go again – I did some more futzing with Photoshop, and here is the new new background. I’m using the laptop, so once again I rely on your input to let me know if the colour is hideous. I’m going for a mellow, yellowy-orange, not bright, screaming acid yellow, so I implore you to give some idea of what you’re looking at.
The current colour is “light goldenrod.” It was “Navajo white” for a day or two, but I was uneasy about the hex code: FFDEAD.
I toned down the flowers, as per Francois’ suggestion, so the text should be easier to read.